Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Hugs and Kisses

I was on my way to meet an Internet friend in person for the first time and I was looking forward to seeing him.

During the bus journey, I imagined myself kissing passengers on the bus and people I could see outside. I stroked their hair, kissed their cheeks and hugged everyone.

When I met my friend the first thing he gave me was a nice warm hug. It was as if we'd known each other forever. Actually we have known each other forever, we were just pretending we were only meeting for the first time. We went to a local coffee bar. He was easy to be with and fun to chat to. Then he had to go back to work. We arranged to meet up later.

In the meantime, I went to the local bookshop to browse but nothing appealed to me. I decided to go for a stroll in the park nearby. During my walk, a young man approached me. He told me he really liked me. Could he walk with me? I said I didn't mind. He held my hand and stroked it while we walked. He asked me where I was from. He said he was from Lebanon but lives in the local area. After a while we sat down. He kissed my cheeks and my neck, and he stroked my hair. He whispered in my ear that I was beautiful. He even wanted a full on snog but I pulled away. He asked me to go out with him but I said I wasn't available. He asked for my number but I told him I didn't have a mobile, which is true. I must be the only one in London without a mobile phone. I asked him to write his number down knowing full well I had no intention of calling him back, poor sod! We hugged and I kissed him on the cheek and I said goodbye.

That's it, no more fantasising about kissing and hugging people because I only end up with grief.

On my walk I was attracted to a squirrel chomping away at some nuts. Two young guys approached. One offered the squirrel more nuts. The squirrel approached him tentatively. He asked me whether it was safe for the squirrel to approach and I said it was harmless. My friends introduced themselves to me. Both guys were from Hungary; one was working in London and the other was just visiting for a few days. We chatted for a while. One friend shared some of his nuts with me. The other friend offered me cigarette but I said I didn't smoke. I told them I didn't mind if they smoked. They told me about where they were from, which is a lot smaller compared to London. They said they liked London because it was full of beautiful girls. They told me about a night club they went to recently, which was basically a strip joint. I teased them about ogling girls. After a while I said goodbye and wished them a good day. I was relieved that they didn't want to kiss me.

After a few minutes I heard someone calling me. Now what? It was my Hungarian friends. They asked if they could pose with me and have their pictures taken, which I did. I took a picture of both of them then I said goodbye.

I met my friend later after he'd finished work and we went for a walk at another park. We sat in front of the lake. I fed the pigeons the nuts my Hungarian friend had given me earlier. My friend and I shared experiences and realisations. It was also lovely to share parts of the park he'd never seen before including the Princess Diana Memorial Fountain and the Albert Memorial. It was a joy being with my friend who is very warm and affectionate.

Later on my bus home a young man came on and sat beside me. "Hello beautiful," he said. Oh no, not again! Fortunately I was getting off at the next stop. I only had time to tell him my name and I was off. Just as I was about to wave goodbye I heard someone calling my name. It was the same guy. He had got off the bus. Bugger! He grabbed my hand and asked if he could come home with me and I said no. He was Italian and very cute. I am a sucker for Italian men, mama mia! He gave me a big hug and kissed my forehead, cheeks, neck and pecked my lips. We hugged until my bus arrived. Before I said goodbye I told him I couldn't possibly go out with him because I had a boyfriend. Well I had to make something up otherwise he would have got on the bus with me.

As I see it, the hugs and kisses I received demonstrate my belief that only One exists. When I imagine myself kissing someone I am kissing myself. It's strange though how only young men are open to play that game. I'm obviously projecting an image of myself as a young, heterosexual, attractive female, which is going to attract attention from young men. It's all fun and games anyway.

Hugs and kisses to all.


Related articles: The Great Pretender; Free Hugs; The Presence - Where the Sun is Always Shining; If At First You Don't Succeed, Lie Again; One Love, Many Guises and Special Relationships; As I Love Others, I am Loving Myself; As High as a Kite; Cherished Memories